Showering Naked with Dudes...Not A Big Deal. Really.

I've served with many people in the Navy.  Gay, straight, Muslim, Christian, Mormon, Buddhist, Yankee fans.  So with the coming out of defensive back Michael Sam as gay my first thought isn't about locker room hazing.  The fact is, if you've served in the military or showered in huge locker rooms with your teammates, you've more than likely unknowingly showed off your crowned jewels to a man who is attracted to your sex.  Out of all the times you've peed in a public urinal, that guy next to you, yep he's gay...you're never safe, or at least you never are if you live you're life in homophobia.  You going to start giving side eye to the guy next to you in the bathroom?  Just to see if he's checking out your junk?  Better not, because he probably is.  But chances are he's probably not attracted to you.  So many people seem very surprised by this.  Don't take offense.

Paranoia and vanity seep into the crevices of their brain. Common concerns I've heard I'd like to address, as a straight man: "What if I get raped?"  "This is a man's game!"  "I'm not homophobic, I just don't want that shit around me!" 

Rape?  If 20 men happen to be around a gay man, I guarantee you the gay guy is most likely to be threatened.  As irresistible as every man believes himself to be, gay guys aren't just waiting for you to fall on your head, lose consciousness, and wake up with a condom hanging out of your butt.  A prevalent fear is that of sexual assault and aggression from gay men.  Ironically, this is a manifestation of men who are afraid of being objectified.  Objectification that was once (and still) is primarily reserved for women.  The fears elicited by athletes and conservative culture reflect a concern that is normally placed exclusively on women.  How's it feel, brothas?  Better cover up before you become victims of your own male gaze!

A man's game?  Michael Sam is an SEC defensive player of the year.  The SEC.  SEC.  Known for their giant defensive linemen (and he's comparatively smaller) who have combine scores that would make your face flush with exhaustion before blacking out after the first event.  If you don't think Michael Sam is a "man", I dare you to sit in for a practice and play a little one-on-one tackle football.  We'll keep the ambulance on the field, but you have to do the sutures yourself.  Like a man.

You're not gay, but you don't want gay people around you?  I get it.  Separate but equal.  Kinda like the antebellum South.  You'd be fine with a gay and straight only shower, but you're not homophobic at all.  Of course not.  An enabler of a homophobic culture at the least (but mostly a homophobe).

A piece I read on www.racialicious.com quoted sports commentator, Dale Hansen, who's probably stated it best since this whole fiasco took over ESPN talk points:

It wasn’t that long ago when we were being told that black players couldn’t play in “our” games because it would be “uncomfortable.” And even when they finally could, it took several more years before a black man played quarterback. Because we weren’t “comfortable” with that, either.

Many are comparing Michael Sam to Jackie Robinson.  I'm not making that leap.  I believe the difficulties of visibility, legacies of oppression, and politics between the two eras aren't similar.  However with gay children committing suicide and a heteronormative culture that disavows homophobia yet advocates "separate but equal" policies taken from the pages of archived antebellum handbooks, the impact of Sam's coming out cannot be denied.  There is now an affirmation for those who are lost.  Anonesty despite the critical back lash and possible sour career outcome.  The freedom to be who you are in your home and in uniform. 

Discrimination is discrimination.  It's that simple, gay or nay.